*palin comparison.

Not-so-live blogging Sarah Palin:

0:03

KC: Do you consider yourself a feminist?
SP: I do[?]!

Well, that was fast. I thought I'd have time to at least crack open a Diet Coke before she said something that sounded insincere.

There was a level of uncertainty there that almost convinced me she isn't sure what the word means.

0:12

SP: I believe that women, uh, certainly today have every opportunity that a man has.

OK. Convinced. Feminism isn't about equal rights, asshat. 'Cept that one you'd like to take away from us. Remember that one? Good times.

0:44

What's with the forced stroll? SP looks like she's scanning for exits. Seriously, pause it at 0:48. That is a woman with her pageant-question game face on.

0:52

SP: I've read most of them, again, with a great appreciation for the press, for the media ...

Aw, flattery will get you nowhere with K Couric. She is desperate to use the word "specifically" with you, and you just opened that door right on up.

SP: All of 'em. Any of 'em, that have been in front of me all these years ...

Someone met with her speech coach this morning! You see, saying, "all these years," gives the ILLUSION of EXPERIENCE. Don't let the lack of fine lines and wrinkles fool you. This woman has read ALL the papers. And it's taken her years.

1:11

SP: Alaska isn't a foreign country[, idiot].

KC is pissed. I'm not sure condescension was the way to go, there.

1:15

Why does she say "Washington, DC" as though she just learned where it is on a map?

1:20

SP: Alaska is like a microcosm of America.

Alaska
69% white
3% black
5% hispanic

America
68% white
12% black
15% hispanic

I know. Math is tough!

1:24

KC: What's your position on global warming? Do you believe it's man-made or not?
SP: Well, we're the only Arctic state, of course, Alaska, so we feel the impacts more than any other state up there with the changes in the climate ...

Okey dokey then. Asked and ... not answered.

1:49

KC: Is it man-made, though, in your view?

Atta girl.

1:50

SP: You know, there are man's activities that can be contributed to these issues that we're dealing with now with these impacts.

Wait, what? Man's (thanks, btw, on behalf of all us ladies) activities can be contributed to the hoo hah? OK, maybe you misspoke. You meant "man's activities can be contributed to these impacts."

1:59

SP: I'm not going to solely blame all of man's activities on changes in climate ...

False alarm! You're just stupid.

2:40

Hoo HOO. Now it's gonna get interesting.

SP: I would counsel to choose life. I would like to see a culture of life in this country, but I would also like to see taking it one step further. Not just saying, "I am pro-life and I want to see fewer and fewer abortions in this country," but I want then those women who find themselves in circumstances that are absolutely less than ideal ...

See, I'm going to have to cut her off, there. I think, perhaps, she is (again) confused. "I would like to see fewer abortions in this country" is an everybody position, not a pro-life one. And I have to say that categorizing incestuous rape as a "circumstance" a child would just "find itself in" that is "less than ideal" is an ignorant and inhumane assessment.

3:13

SP: I am saying that personally I would counsel that person to choose life ...

Yeah, that'd be pro-choice, Sarah. I mean, this woman is confused, right? At least she amended it to "horrific, horrific circumstances," which is at least not wildly off the mark.

3:31

SP: ... should anyone end up in jail for having had an abortion [italics mine]

I find the tense here reaaaaaaaaaaally scary. "Having had" one? You think there's a possibility people would want to retroactively prosecute? The idea that that is even ON THE TABLE is terrifying.

3:45

SP, re the morning-after pill: Well, I'm all for contraception and I'm all for any preventative measures.

Hee. She had five kids.

3:55

SP: But, Katie, again, I am one to believe that life starts at the moment of conception ...

Wait.

4:14

I appreciate your doggedness, KC, but "Do you condone or condemn the morning-after pill?" is sort of a stupid (and leading) question. It's meant to trap her. She's easily confused. Eventually she'll wander into the tar pit on her own. You don't have to throw her in.

4:28

SP: Personally, I would not choose to participate in that kind of contraception.

See above re: five kids to further my point re: stupid question.

4:30

KC: Do you believe evolution should be taught as an accepted scientific principle, or one of several theories?

Could she have asked that any more slowly? I especially like the emphasis on "principle" and the explanatory gesticulating during "several theories," as though she's afraid SP isn't familiar with those terms.

5:08

KC, voiceover: The governor told us though she's not a member of any church, she visits a couple of them regularly when she's home.

I don't know what "visits a couple of them regularly" means. It sounds a little like, "I didn't inhale." Sort of, well, I go to church but I don't much listen. I can buy that. But KC's scoffing is getting audible.

PAUSE

OK. This is when you need to open a window, make a cocktail, and take some deep breaths. Because it gets really offensive from here on out.

I'm going to give it to you verbatim. Then I am going to go apeshit.

5:36

SP: As for homosexuality, I am not going to judge Americans and the decisions that they make in their adult personal relationships. I have, um, one of my absolute best friends for the last 30 years who happens to be gay, and I love her dearly. And she is not my "gay friend" she is one of my best friends, who happens to have made a choice that isn't a choice that I have made. But I'm not going to judge people.

Oh my sputter. You were raised by a science teacher and you can't get that being gay isn't a choice? The way you say it is offensive enough, by the way, as though you have a dirty sock in your mouth. When you say "gay," we hear you say, "gay, ew," just so you know. You aren't hiding it. Thinking being gay is a choice is like thinking the world is flat. It exposes you as someone who does not, in fact, read any of those newspapers you purport to have read. And that one was published in 1993, just after your first election to city council 15 years ago, which makes the absurdity of your position all the more glaring.

One of your best friends is gay? Classic. I'm sure she's overjoyed that you've managed to accept her despite her "choice."

Gay people are among the most maligned in this country, part of the dwindling number of people still being denied basic rights. And if this election has done anything, it's shone a light on the still-secondary position women hold, particularly when attempting to attain positions of power and influence. By that equation, gay women like your best friend are in big trouble if you are elected.

This renders me speechless (or mostly so), and that's no mean feat. I know that in my state my vote will not matter. It's too red, and I'm too blue. But I'm going to vote my ass off anyway. For my house, for my 401(k), for my sister's children, for my hybrid car, for my uterus, and for my people. Especially the boys who kiss boys. And like it.



(Photo taken PROUDLY on the Woodside. Thanks for the sign, L Sis.)